So. I just read this book. I DNF’d it. It filled me with rage. Hint: if you’re writing trans characters, do me a favor: don’t make it out like we’re lucky to find someone who deigns to have sex with us. Likewise, don’t approach our bodies with a sense of fascination that would seem out of place in a book with only cis bodies. Because FUCK YOU.

Ahem.

So I was going to write about that. Because RAGE. So much rage. And this is a popular book that was recommended to me. It’s got four stars on Goodreads. And it’s a goddamn horror show. (And no, I’m not gonna tell you what it is.)

I got all worked up and started writing a post in my head and then I realized something very important: it’s not my job to protect the world from trash representation of trans folks. And writing a rage post had exactly zero chances of enriching my life. Instead of doing that, I’m gonna write about stuff I absolutely love. Which will totally and completely enrich my life.

Hamilton. All the Hamilton.

Look, we know I love Hamilton. I fell in love with Hamilton with the King George domestic violence ballad (I will send a fully armed battalion to remind you of my love indeed). I’ve read all the Genius.com notes. I’ve read all the Hamilton letters to Laurens and Laffayette. I’ve read the Chernow biography.

When I get obsessed, I go down hard, y’all. I trust you already knew that.

Also, I made a video. I KNOW, OKAY? I KNOW.

Concerned I was perhaps going to overdo it (a phenomenon in my household which is referred to as lisaloebing something: consuming it so frequently that you end up sick of it), I decided to branch out. To more Lin-Manuel Miranda. LIKE Y’DO.

This is like when I binged on Society of Gentlemen over and over again and had to break the spell by branching out…to A Charm of Magpies. Again: LIKE Y’DO. (I mean, I know you catch the reference to KJ Charles. Obviously.)

Ahem.

So I loaded In the Heights (thanks be to Amazon Prime), and started listening. And I’m not gonna lie: ITH didn’t hook me as immediately as Hamilton did. I liked “Breathe” and “Benny’s Dispatch”, but it wasn’t until the comedy of “No Me Diga” (and, naturally, queerness, to which I am attuned) that I really started paying attention.

Then I hit “Blackout” and I was like OH MY GOD, THIS IS THE “NON-STOP” OF ITH. And then I was hooked.

It’s totally not fair to say anything in ITH is the whatever of Hamilton. Clearly “Non-stop” has inherited some feels from “Blackout”, if you grant my opinion merit. (And you might not. I don’t know musicals. I am, at best, a tiny baby musicals fan. If I sound like I’m full of shit, I probably am.)

But as someone who was already invested in Hamilton, that’s what I compare to. So. Chronology purists will simply have to accept that.

Follows my silly, ridiculous, and absolutely fucking goofy side-by-side of ITH and Hamilton. And I gotta say, I basically listen to nothing but ITH lately. I edit to it. I write to it. I have it on loop. I love every second.

Carla is the King George of ITH.

She only pops in a couple of times, but every time she does, you laugh, because AS LONG AS HE KEEPS IT CLEAN. Am I right?

“Blackout” is the “Non-stop” of ITH.

Look, “Non-stop” includes some of my favorite lines ever written. That cut me deeply to my soul. But in terms of the role these two songs are playing in the shows (and I will assume this is a normal musical thing, but as covered: I know dick about musicals), they are the final songs of act one, and as such, each of them has a load to bear. “Non-stop” has to cover a whole range of time and plot to cover, moving the action forward, revisiting everyone important, pulling in all the goddamn threads.

“Blackout” also pulls in all the threads (If you find my family, bring them home, oh my god). And the end has a similar call-and-response (motherfucking fireworks, y’all). It also sets up everything that comes after. “Blackout” is the promise of the rest of the show. (And then the show shatters your ass. Because it’s so fucking good.)

Nina is the Angelica of ITH, but with a way happier ending. (Shut up. All the Nina/Benny fanfic lives in my head.)

Nina’s smart as shit, and daring, and she wonders what shit would have been like if certain things hadn’t happened the way they did (if her parents hadn’t left Puerto Rico).

Angelica’s smart as shit, and daring, and she wonders what shit would have been like if certain things hadn’t happened the way they did (if she hadn’t sized Hamilton up so quickly, and sort of gifted him to Eliza…one wonders if the real life Angelica imagined what things would have been like if she’d been single when she met him).

Sonny is the Laurens of ITH.

Dude, this one’s obvious. Like, he’s kind of a punk jackass, but he’s also super passionate and committed and he has that whole like sociopolitical breakdown thing, and also he sees the neighborhood the most clearly, with the widest lens. I fucking love both Sonny and Laurens.

Abuela Claudia is the Washington of ITH.

(Note: in case you’ve missed it, Chris Jackson is a for real weekly cast member on a CBS show called Bull, also featuring Michael Weatherly. It’s basically Lie to Me, but with Weatherly instead of Roth, and a slightly different focus. I dig it, so far, because A) Chris Jackson, B) Chris Jackson plays a gay former football player, and C) there has been, inside of three episodes, a whole other queer character. Which means there has been, inside three episodes, an ep with TWO ENTIRE NON-RELATED-TO-EACH-OTHER QUEER CHARACTERS. I know. I was shocked, too.)

Anyway.

Abuela Claudia holds the whole community together. Look no further than “Everything I Know”, and prepare to fucking cry. It’s amazing. Every little scrap of paper, oh my god. *sniffles* Washington does the same damn thing, he’s the tie that binds, paternal at times, strong as hell, knowing he has to keep his folks together if he wants this whole thing to work out.

What else?

Listen, you got more? Give ’em to me! Hamilton and In the Heights: GO!